Blog Buddy: Motivation or Just Alliteration?
December 5, 2009
Everyone was crowded around the circular table, discussing online memes, geometry, and mecha. Like clockwork, 5th period brought my newly made friends to the corner of the cafeteria. We all shared at least one class together and this closely knit group never ran out of conversational topics. My friend, Jason, discussed how he started a blog about his life as a “Stuy” student.
Stuy, an affectionate nickname for our school, spawns stereotypical ‘nerd’ references when mentioned by others.
-In Stuy, you can have a social life, sleep, and good grades. Pick two out of three.
Or so they say.
We as the student body embrace these comments and make jokes about them. I do not think that our work load is any heavier than other high schools. The expectations they place on us make us work harder, or at least I do.
Back to Jason’s blog, which he said he’ll show me after he had posted five entries, which is reasonable, so I suggested the same with mine. I think having a blog buddy would motivate me to write more, which is goal #2.
Speaking of goals, goal #1 was on the back of my mind when I spotted a classmate of mine this morning. She walked in beautiful high-heels, a couple of steps ahead of me. I poked my cheeks and rubbed them in a circular motion, trying to stimulate a normal smile. The corners of my lips pulled up in the most awkward way and I dismissed that idea until I had more practice in the mirror. The clicking of her heels diverged my train of thought and the hypnotic sound enchanted it into a dark tunnel, (if trains of thought may be enchanted.) Ugly thoughts quickly replaced goal #1, (ah, such a young, fleeting thought of mine.)
She walks with such confidence; each unhesitant click signals that she has a place to go, a place where she is needed. And her arm! Look at how it swings, such elegance, and matched with that posture. To maintain that without looking stiff while wearing heels to top it off! *sigh*
While trying to summarize my thoughts at the moment here, I feel pathetic. I can’t believe I let such nonsense run through my brain, wrecking havoc to all my common sense. Jealousy, I realize, is an emotion that unfortunately influences my thoughts greatly. I’m a dreamer, and unfortunately not a do-er. All this dreaming stems from this envy I have. Many say that this murky green emotion is a dirty sin, and I understand why. Jealousy is getting me nowhere and is clouding my skies. So goal #3 is to stop comparing myself to other people without doing anything to improve myself.
